Anxiety s like a toddler with a megaphone, relentlessly screaming until it gets your attention. If it had a motto it would be why worry tomorrow when you can worry today?
Anxiety tells us that we have something to fear. It heightens our senses, lowers our ability to think clearly, and generally tells us that we are not capable.
Strategy #1: Catch it
Remember when you were a kid and you used to catch fireflies? You would take a mason jar outside and intentionally look for short flashes of light, ending with catching as many flies as you could. You would watch in awe as the light would flicker about the jar, creating a beautiful scene. Maybe you would count the flashes of light. Maybe you would see if they were different colors, or some shone brighter than others.
Now imagine that you didn’t know fireflies existed. You are standing outside when suddenly you see quick bouts of light. It might scare you enough to run back inside.
Anxiety is like a firefly. If you don’t know what it is, you will run away from it and hope it doesn’t hurt you. But if you know how it appears while uncomfortable, maybe it won’t be as scary.
Catching anxiety requires you to start paying attention to:
- Your body. What happens when you feel anxious? Does your heart rate spike? Shoulders get tense? For me, my lips get numb (weird, right?).
- What are you thinking?
- What are you feeling?
The simplest way to begin catching anxiety is simply to notice what you are noticing. Pay attention to your body’s signals and environment. Observe how you are engaging with yourself and those around you. I advise spending at least a week just noticing. Set an alarm every hour and do a body scan. Where do you feel tense? What thoughts are going through your mind? What are you feeling?
Strategy #2: Get Curious
What is anxiety telling you?
I always say “if this anxiety had a voice, what would it be telling me?”
Collecting the story around your anxiety will help you to identify a starting point. Maybe your anxiety is telling you that you will fail at something, or that everyone is judging you. Whatever it is, get curious.
Once you have identified the story, get more curious. Ask yourself questions like:
- What is telling me that I will fail?
- Where is that message coming from (maybe you grew up being told you were a failure)?
- Is there evidence that this is true?
- Can I consider alternatives to failing?
By allowing yourself to get curious, you empower yourself to take control of the narrative. Does this mean that your anxiety will suddenly be gone?
No. But it does mean that you are not completely stuck in the thinking that whatever is causing anxiety is an absolute truth.
Monica Pitek-Fugedi is a therapist, author, speaker and creator of the CALMER method for managing anxiety. You can find workbooks, courses and online resources at https:www.anxietyanecdotes.com
